Bartending School: Top notch education or silly rip-off scam artistry?

I'm gonna go out on a limb and surprise everyone with the statement that I'm not happy with my career. Yes, I said it.

I've been recently pursuing interests that stand outside the confines of Corporate America, but that it seems to have it's grasp on everything. Ideas that have come to mind include, but not limited to: major league umpire training, talent scout, firefighter, and jobs at companies that don't make you work very hard.

The other one is bartending. I feel like everyone has thought of this one, but I can't get past the fact that there are a ton of douche-bag bartenders in the world, and that I could be very non-douche-like. Oh, and if you're at the right bar, you make sick cash that you don't have to give to Obama*

So I contacted a Bartending School! YES!! $800 for 3 weeks training and "lifetime placement program" (OUCH). Here's how I see it. If I had $800, I wouldn't need a new job and I wouldn't be lowering myself to running around a narrow path to pour drinks for stupid drunk people who I will potentially have to jump over the counter to engage in physical hand-to-hand combat with. As much as I want to hurt people with my bare fists on a month to month basis, I just don't want to shell out $800 to do it when I could probably just read a book.

This wasn't a satisfactory response for the woman who calls the day of the tour to make sure you're actually going to show up. This alone tells me that they must have people cancel a lot. I told her she might have a higher turnout if she didn't refuse to give out basic information about their program (i.e. the cost) over the phone. She quickly made bad comments about other bartending schools, but what she didn't realize is that I stopped caring about 1 minute into the conversation. She then asked how I found out the tuition ripoff (cost)...I then informed her of an invention that Former Vice President Al Gore had created in the mid 1990's*

Scratch that one off the list. Maybe if you guys are right about me writing this blog then I could be free from the chains of finances and be set for life. But I won't hold my breath.



*Notes controversial comment, feel free to argue in the comments section, just don't expect a respectful or reasonable response, if any response at all. That's what therapists are for.